Self-medication: the basics for HSTS

The UK is suffering a backlash against transition and HSTS are affected disproportionately. This assault is being orchestrated by TERFs, so called ‘gender-crits’ and justifies itself using the words of individuals like Oren Amitay and Ken Zucker, while conspicuously ignoring the advice of those like Dr Diane Ehrensaft. As a result, a number of worrying developments have taken place recently which may lead to young trans people not being able to access the hormones and treatments they need. Self-medication, while not ideal, must be considered.

We note also, with concern, that various Government bodies in the UK have been deleting links to advice sites on transsexualism, for example Mermaids. We’ll be putting up these links up here so that people can access them.

Many thanks to Transit UK for their information.

Continue reading “Self-medication: the basics for HSTS”

Children in Transition 1

True or homosexual transsexualism, which is usually known as HSTS, is the product of ‘transgender homosexuality’. In this, the individual experiences anomalies in testosterone delivery while still developing in his or her mother’s womb. In girls, too much will cause masculinisation but in boys, too little will cause feminisation. The effects may be observed in children.

The effects of this depend on the severity of the anomaly and the point in foetal development at which it occurred. For example, in boys, the genitalia develop before the brain structures related to sexuality and gender do. So a boy can be born with normal genitalia and, potentially, a sexuality that is so feminised as to be completely female.

The effects of this may be seen soon after birth, when children will begin to display opposite-sex behaviour and play patterns. These are often called ‘Gender Non Conforming’ or GNC but this is misleading, since they are actually sex non-conforming. These may include toy preferences and role preferences in community play. This can begin to be observed as young as age two and parents should be vigilant. If persistent and consistent ‘GNC’, which I will now refer to as ‘sex non-conforming’ or SNC, is being observed in their child then there may well be an issue.

The effects of the testosterone delivery anomalies cannot be cured or repaired. While their intensity varies, they do not resolve themselves as the child approaches adolescence. In milder cases, the child may, under pressure from parents, peers and professionals,  may outwardly present sex-conforming gender traits. This is not desirable, as it will lead to problems later in life.

In the past, unfortunately, this was usually touted as a great triumph for the parents or professionals who had been trying to achieve exactly this result, that is, to suppress SNC behaviours and replace them with conforming ones. But this has always been a mistake, formed in the erroneous belief that gender is learned. It is not. It is specifically conditioned by sexuality and as we have seen, this is one of the parameters that can be conditioned by in-utero testosterone delivery.

Children are agreeable

Children try very hard to please the adults around them and, as a result may go along with the expressed desires of those adults, especially when they are couched in particularly hostile or menacing terms, such as ‘if you go on like this you’ll never fit in’. Even worse is parental shunning, which is simple child abuse.

This means that whatever the child is going to be, that child is going to be, even if he or she is forced to cover it up. Often, sadly, ill-informed professionals will suggest that life might be easier if the child were to become one of the ‘regular gay folks’ whom these individuals imagine are living perfectly happy, well adjusted lives. The trouble is, they’re not.

If a boy has inverted sexuality, then he has female sexuality. That means he desires to be penetrated but much more than that; it means he wants a strong masculine man to do it — just like any other normal girl. Similarly, a girl with sexual inversion wants a beautiful, feminine young woman to love. Yet in the Anglosphere in particular, conventional ‘gay’ wisdom insists that ‘regular gay folks’ should form bonds with other ‘regular gay folks’. In other words, that highly feminised males with female sexuality should partner others just like them, and vice versa for girls. This is partly the result of a complete failure to understand transgender homosexuality as well as, unfortunately, the activities of misguided ‘gay’ political activists.

But any relationship between two male transgender homosexuals is, by definition, lesbian, when what they want to be is the female partner in a heterosexual, or at least, heterogender, relationship. This is inverted in females.

I was recently contacted by a charming individual, a very masculinised female transgender homosexual, who complained bitterly that, while her parents had accepted her lesbianism, they constantly tried to make her have relationships with other ‘butch lesbians’ and could not understand why she wanted to date highly feminine, conventionally attractive straight girls. This had blighted her life. She sent me pictures of two of her former partners — exactly the kind of girls that a straight man would date: feminine, pretty, stylish, sexy.

The problem, of course was that my correspondent’s parents were typical ‘liberals’ while she herself, like nearly all transgender homosexuals, is conservative. These individuals do not wish to challenge social, sexual or gender norms. They are not seeking to promote the latest politically correct gender fad. They just want to fit into society, in a completely conventional manner, in the gender they feel themselves to be. There’s nothing ‘transgressive’ or ‘politically correct’ about it. They just want to be themselves and they will change everything about themselves so that they can be accepted as such. They have no interest in ‘changing the world’; they just want a social space in it, on their own terms.

Transgender homosexuals are the same as heterosexual people except their sexuality does not match their birth sex. That’s the only difference. In other words, male transgender homosexuals are no more attracted to other such, of the same sex, than any other girl would be, so why would they date them? Same applies to females. Butch lesbians want Suzy Creamcheese, not Bob the Builder.

‘Gay’ lifestyle

Any transgender homosexual who ends up joining the ‘gay’ lifestyle will not be happy, because their sexual targets are not available to them there. There are no genuinely masculine males in that culture; they are all either transgender themselves, narcissistic homosexuals or pederasts. Something similar appears true of females, although there is less evidence of pederasty. There is no hope of finding an appropriate partner for a transgender homosexual in these circles. None.

Gender and sexuality are inextricably linked. It is true that ‘gay’ activists and ‘queer theorists’ deny this, but they are living a lie that they hope others will join them in. If you have male sexuality, then your gender must be masculine, since you wish to attract partners happy to be penetrated by you. If you have female sexuality, then your gender must be feminine, because you seek masculine male partners.  Feminine ‘gay’ males have female sexuality and butch lesbians have male sexuality. Rocket science, this is not.

If the sexuality-gender  link is broken, then the individual will suffer Gender Dysphoria (GD). This is simply transition desire taken to the next level of intensity. It is axiomatic that all transgender homosexuals, who remain sex-conforming, will suffer from GD. The intensity of their discomfort will depend on the precise nature of the discrepancies in testosterone delivery they received in utero — and possibly, the amount of substance abuse they indulge in to suppress it.

This is why ‘gay men’ are so angry

Have you ever wondered why ‘gay men’ are so famously ‘waspish’? Why is Owen Jones so angry all the time? What about Peter Tatchell? Why is it that the ‘happy gays’ are always the most flamboyant, effeminate ones? Because the former are desperately suppressing their natural gender and the latter are, at least partially, accepting it.

For those people whose Sexual Inversion is most powerful, then full transition to the opposite gender is necessary to avoid a life of misery and self-loathing. For boys it is worse, as, within the LGB cult,  they will be preyed on ruthlessly by pederasts whose attraction is to their youthful masculinity — and who will quickly dump them for a younger partner. This horrible, abusive cult is entirely of Western making. It exists nowhere else. No parent in their right mind should desire this for a son, when that son could transition, become a beautiful daughter and find a decent man to love her.

This result is possible; transgender homosexuals and HSTS are a very small number of people, but the numbers of potential partners are increasing rapidly. Over the last ten years, the number of publicly visible MtF HSTS in the West has increased dramatically, but so has the number of straight men prepared to be their partners. In time and with good will, this should stabilise. If men are able to refuse the status of ‘gay’, forced upon them for their heterogender desire for transwomen, then they are far more likely to openly indulge it; the same applies to women partnered with masculine lesbians. These are heterogender, conventional relationships. Nothing ‘gay’ about them.

That this drives a coach and horses through the whole Western concept of ‘gay’ and ‘queer’ identities should concern nobody; these very identities were invented less than 70 years ago, for political expediency and their time has run out.

Parents of children like this need to be pro-active.

We have read much from advocates of status quo, many of whom are little better than transphobes, exalting the wonderful life that can be found inside the gay male lifestyle. It has become a Shibboleth, a sacred cow. One must never criticise the New Gay Man.

Yet the figures do not add up. Almost no ‘gay men’ are in longstanding relationships. Those that last more than one year are exceptional and most last only weeks. Occasionally, it is true, two male transgender homosexuals will form a bond but in this case, it is probable either that one will become more noticeably masculine and the other feminine, or that they very quickly stop having sex. Suicidality is high and life satisfaction low. As they age, many transgender male homosexuals will themselves become pederastic predators, seeking to love the beautiful boys they once were, especially if they were themselves pedicated by an older man around puberty.

Parents need to be aware that much of what they are being told comes from a political viewpoint which insists that conventional Western homosexuality, that is, sex-conforming, is the only form. But that is a flat lie. All over the world, sex-conforming homosexuality is so exceptional as to be practically non-existent. SNC forms are far more prevalent and have been, throughout history. Indeed, the forms seen mainly in the Anglophone West did not exist prior to the 1960s. This is a recent, politically correct model, that is all.

Unfortunately, it survives by luring new recruits in and to the advocates for this lifestyle, like, famously, Jim Fourratt, every HSTS who transitions is meat lost to their grinder.


Parents need to be aware of several things. If you have a child who is exhibiting SNC behaviours, then there is a chance that he or she is transgender homosexual. If these behaviours are presistent, consistent and insistent, in other words, are more than a passing fad, then the likelihood of this is hugely increased.

A transgender homosexual will always be homosexual. The question is only about how he or she appears. You cannot ‘cure’ this form of homosexuality. It is not acquired but instead is innate.

A transgender homosexual will transition if his or her transition desire is stronger than his or her fear of the consequences of transition. Further, they will only transition if they believe they can ‘pass’, that is, be able to live, unremarked, in their desired gender.

In addition, they tend to be extremely agreeable people who can often be easily led. This means that parents must be extremely careful in what they say. It is true that some transgender homosexuals can live in sex-conforming roles, but this is at the cost of a life of Gender Dysphoria. This can lead to self harm and suicide. It certainly will lead to diminished self-worth and almost certainly, to resentment.

Especially for males, transgender homosexuals have a a limited time. If they do not transition by around the age of twenty, they may not be able to at all, since the masculinisation being effected on their bodies by testosterone may make it impossible for them to ‘pass’. Sadly, it appears to be the end of certain commenters, including some claiming to be professionals, to ensure exactly this: that transgender homosexuals are prevented from transitioning until it is too late.

Gendercrit — a vicious alliance

A vicious alliance of feminists and homosexual activists has come together as the ‘gender critical’ or ‘gendercrit’ movement. These are politically motivated individuals. The feminists believe in the tired, long debunked crock that ‘gender is just a social construct’ which, of course, the existence of an innate sense of gender destroys completely. So they are determined to suppress any such evidence and they don’t care how much damage they do. At the same time, the New Gay Man homosexual activists are desperate to acquire fresh meat and the one thing no HSTS will ever do, is be a part of the New Gay Man lifestyle.

These people will use any lie and untruth they can find to oppose transition and will savage parents who assist their children in finding their real selves. Do not trust them.

On the other hand, parents should not be railroaded by political activists on the ‘pro-trans’ side. If your child is not homosexual, the chances of a successful transition diminish massively. Some non-homosexual individuals may transition successfully, especially if they do so in their teens, but most — and this applies especially to females — will struggle.

The reason is that the same anomalies in testosterone delivery that cause the sexual inversion and lead to transgender homosexuality, also affect other areas. Affected males are feminised across a range of parameters and females are masculinised. In other words, they naturally look like the opposite sex. Non-homosexual transition desire is not founded in sexual inversion at all and so the affected individuals do not share these qualities. They are unremarkable men, or unremarkable women and are sex-conforming on all parameters. Transition for these individuals, except for a fortunate few, is a challenge.

Homosexuals and non-homosexuals are different.

For transgender homosexuals, however, transition is the natural and most reasonable thing to do. Parents must not push the ‘gay lifestyle’ on their children, even if they are called ‘homophobic’ for not doing so. After all, how is homophobia worse than transphobia?

For the parents of non-homosexual children the situation is much more complicated.

In the end, the child alone must decide what is best for him or her. It is a parent’s job to listen, to protect and to assist. It is not a parent’s job to decide, but to support.

Sexual Inversion and HSTS: a causative link


Many people have asked for more details about the background to HSTS, homosexual transition desire and the cause of these phenomena. These are legitimate questions. The answer, with a massive amount of supporting evidence and research, appears to be a phenomenon that was discovered over a hundred years ago, called ‘Sexual Inversion’.

Sexual Inversion is the theory that anomalies in sexuality and gender are the result of biological rather than psychological factors. It is well established. There is plenty of evidence to suggest that it is what causes Transgender Homosexuality, which can be either feminine-male or masculine female. This means that it is also the underlying cause of homosexual transition desire, which becomes homosexual Gender Dysphoria in severe cases, and, ultimately, True or Homosexual Transsexualism (HSTS). The striking clustering of physical attributes and behavioural conditions typical of HSTS have always suggested an innate, biological cause and Sexual Inversion is the obvious one. It was identified over a hundred years ago by Karl Ulrichs and expanded on by Havelock Ellis.

Numerous papers have supported this idea and, most recently, Professor Simon Baron-Cohen has extensively studied the phenomenon of hormone delivery issues in utero. While Baron-Cohen’s interest is in other effects of this phenomenon, much of his work, again, supports the Sexual Inversion Theory.

Sexual Inversion is most likely a result of anomalies in testosterone delivery in the womb. This can have numerous effects. The Theory posits that one, where less than optimal amounts is delivered to boy foetuses, results in feminisation across a range of parameters including sexuality, ie boys are same-sex attracted and so cross-gender identified, from childhood and girls the opposite. Sexual Inversion therefore should properly be thought of as an ‘intersex’ condition rather than a ‘trans’ one. It is biological rather than psychological.

Transgender Homosexuals and Sexual Inversion

Transgender Homosexuals are those individuals sufficiently affected by Sexual Inversion for it to have affected their sexuality in obvious ways. This is not always the case; in mild forms, sexuality may not be affected enough to be obvious or even visible.

Some are really on the cusp; they inhabit a somewhat indeterminate gender zone, which in the West is often misidentified as ‘non-binary’. It’s not, it’s just a point on the aetiology between fully feminine and somewhat masculine gender presentation, resulting from incomplete Sexual Inversion and social intolerance of transition. It’s quite common to meet such individuals sometimes as girls and sometimes as boys; one gets used to it and the surprise is often that they can do it so well. But for some, the effect is so strong that they have real difficulty living in the gender normally correspondent to their sex. These are the HSTS, the True transsexuals.

To dig deeper, we need to understand the two basic types of transitioner as defined by Dr Ray Blanchard: Homosexual and Nonhomosexual. Although Blanchard has, to my knowledge, never stated this, it seems clear that his Homosexual category is identical to previous descriptions of those with Sexual Inversion: they are transgender homosexuals. It is, at least, impossible to draw a distinction between the two descriptions. Blanchard also commented on the striking homogeneity of what he called ‘feminine homosexual males’, which again, corresponds exactly to the Sexual Inversion theory.

Blanchard seems to have de facto accepted the logic of Sexual Inversion as the explanation for HSTS, without ever explicitly saying so, certainly in his papers, although perhaps he alluded to it more in lectures. His investigation into nonhomosexual types therefore became something like ‘It’s easy to explain the homosexual type, since they obviously have Sexual Inversion; but how can we explain non-homosexual transition desire, since they clearly do not?’

In Blanchard, ‘homosexuals’ are ‘exclusively attracted to same-sex from childhood’. Nonhomosexual is everyone else. There is no ‘bisexual’ classification. All transitioners — indeed, all of us — are either homosexual or nonhomosexual by this measure. It is an on-off switch. However, this conflicts with what we know of Sexual Inversion.

Bisexuals and Freud

The Western sense of the word ‘bisexual’ was popularised by Freud, who was a convinced nurturist. He remains influential in the US, where he was most popular and where, possibly as a result of the US’ history, the idea of genetic predetermination is regarded with hostility. He believed that everyone was bisexual at birth and it was only conditioning that caused them to be either heterosexual or homosexual. Further, he believed that exclusive homosexualism was caused by childhood traumatisation, possibly sexual in nature. Exclusive heterosexuality, on the other hand, was formed by a normalising process of socialisation. He had no explanation for the clustering of physical characteristics and behavioural traits found in transgender homosexuals at all; that alone should be enough to torpedo him.

Freud was partially correct, nonetheless; there is definitely evidence that traumatic experiences can affect sexuality. A clear example would be Pederastic homosexuality, in which boys subject to this often themselves become pederasts. However, Sexual Inversion is an innate form of homosexuality that was identified before Freud came to prominence. That he did not take it more seriously tells us much about Freud’s approach to science: it was useful only when it agreed with his theories.

Freud’s position was important, not least because it was so influential on subsequent thinking. It fitted with the ‘blank slate’ ideology that had been popularised by Franz Boas and later, Margaret Meade. Their ideas can be seen as the foundation of US academic thinking, at least until the late 1960s and the appearance of the Neo-Marxist cultural movement popularly called ‘Postmodernism’ and championed, in this field, by Michel Foucault.

In Blanchard, HSTS are never bisexual; one is either homosexual or nonhomosexual. But this presents us with a conundrum, if the root cause is Sexual Inversion. This, being a biological phenomenon, must exhibit variation. The effect of variation would mean that it is stronger in some cases than in others. That might mean that, at the least affected end of the aetiology, some people are somewhat ambivalent in their sexuality and appearance: bisexual. This sounds as if it should provoke bisexualism, which somewhat contrasts with the Blanchard position. We need to explain this.

For Freud, all people were born bisexual and environment decided sexuality; in the Sexual Inversion model, most people have normative sexuality, while a subset have an innate inversion of sexuality (and therefore gender) that can be full or partial. These are fundamentally different. An environmental factor, social intolerance, does have a role here, in causing the least affected to remain covert about any non-conforming feelings they might have; but again, this is quite different from suggesting that sexuality itself is formed by environment. Sexual Inversion Theory proves that in fact, sexuality and gender are innate and hard-wired together.

Note that we are here taking ‘male inverted sexuality’ to mean ‘female sexuality’ which is to be penetrated and requires feminine gender, to advertise this to the world. (We are not talking about acquired sexualities like Pederastic homosexuality here.)This likely accounts for the well known failure, in the infamous Money/Reimer case, to condition a natal male, whose penis had been burned off during a ‘routine’ circumcision as a baby, into ‘becoming’ a girl. Absent at least some degree of innate Sexual Inversion, it could not possibly have worked. Once again, the link between sexuality and gender is supported by the evidence.

Feminisation and female sexuality

Across the board, all male Transgender Homosexuals, that is, feminine males, those who have been affected by innate Sexual Inversion, are feminised. They are not the only kind of male homosexual, as I’ve pointed out; there are acquired forms too. However, they are all feminised to some degree, notably in sexuality (ie they want to be penetrated and seek men to do it). But we also know that bisexualism (Western sense) is a common part of female sexuality. Together, these would theoretically open the door to the idea that some MtF HSTS might also exhibit it, since they have inverted, ie female, sexuality.

This would not conflict with Blanchard on Autogynephilia, since his Typology states that ‘all nonhomosexual male gender dysphoria (ie, transition desire) is caused by Autogynephilia’. He places no such definitions on Homosexuals, because their homosexuality and thereby their Sexual Inversion, itself is definitive. However, the on/off nature of his triage can be misleading here and I think we are justified in asserting that apparently bisexual attractions and feelings, in young people with Sexual Inversion, should not be regarded as meaning the individual is not HSTS.

However, note: the above means that a Male-to-Feminine (MtF) HSTS, that is, a fully Sexually Inverted male who had transitioned, who did exhibit this attraction to women would be showing, at least partially, lesbian attraction as a part of her female sexuality. I have encountered cases like this, amongst transsexual sex workers who share apartment, bed and life as partners. But this might be more of a lifestyle accommodation than a real desire. Many poorer people from southeast Asia habitually sleep in common beds and it would be easy to misread this. (Again, it is next to impossible to be sure of the truth of what one is being told about a person’s sexuality, when that person is trying to sell some sex, especially when there is a language barrier.) However, it would contrast with what we see in AGP, where pseudo-bisexualism provokes the desire for sex with men.

If this is so, however, then we can explain HSTS, full homosexuality, partial feminisation (effeminacy) and bisexualism all in terms of Sexual Inversion, for both sexes. Given that we have studies that show that anomalies in testosterone delivery do indeed occur, and the length of time the ideas behind it have been expressed, it is baffling that Sexual Inversion is not fully accepted.

Sexual Inversion and Young People

From the point of view of a person who thinks he or she might be HSTS, understanding the nature of Sexual Inversion, that it is innate and cannot be reversed and that the simplest and kindest solution is to follow it to its natural conclusion, transition, is the lesson to take from this. While many such individuals will be comfortable with hormonal and social transition, for some, full surgical transition is necessary.

Happily, sexuality crystallises with age and by roughly one to two years after puberty, it will be clear whether the characteristics of Sexual Inversion are present in sufficient strength to warrant transition. In most cases, everyone will have been aware what was going on for years, anyway. If the diagnosis is affirmative, therapies preparatory to transition should be implemented, including ‘puberty blockers’ and lifestyle options. These will put the brakes on masculinisation (if male) and help the individual to get used to living fully in the target gender. Full endocrine therapy for MtF can be started around sixteen, although the more drastic and long-lasting effects of testosterone in FtM suggest that this should not begin until legal majority.

Sexually inverted young people and those who care for them, today are bombarded by conflicting advice. An unholy alliance of religious conservatives, feminists and conforming ‘gays’ has come together in the ‘Gender Critical Movement’ which is determined to shut down all transition. This is clearly abusive and is happening for obviously political reasons, with no thought for the individuals concerned. On the other hand, enthusiasts are guilty of encouraging transition at far too early an age and without anything like sufficient rigour. The individual and his or her family and professional helpers must find a way through this minefield.

Transition for HSTS: What Can Be Expected for Life?


One often hears only of the poor outcomes when transsexuals are discussed in public forums or in the press and visual media. The prostitute, the public spectacle of the middle aged man dressed up as being “brave” or the publication of a tragic suicide or murder of yet another transsexual. This is, I know from personal experience, what many people fear for someone they love when that person tells them they are transsexual and intend to transition. Though it was some considerable time ago now I know my own mother and father held these same fears for me and vocalised them in an attempt to dissuade me.

I am a Homosexual Transsexual (HSTS). It should be noted that the vast majority of transgender people one sees in the media are not HSTS, but are instead men who suffer from Autogynephillia (AGP) and whose gender dysphoria has lead them to adopt an alternative personality, of someone of the opposite sex. These people have usually led successful lives as men and tend to transition much later in life than HSTS do. These transgender women rarely manage to integrate themselves back into society as their acquired gender after transition and often fulfil some position within the trans community or LGBT movement.

This is not true of HSTS who can usually pass as the opposite sex very early in the transition process and go on to live very normal lives, accepted as women by all those around them.

If you are reading this as a parent of a young HSTS and are concerned about what kind of life your child can expect or if you are a young HSTS with similar worries about your own future, I can assure you that it is possible to live a very normal and successful life after transition, especially these days, where medical help to transition is available to children under 18. To that end I have opted to give a very brief outline of my life so far after 31 years post transition, as part of the information on this site in the hope of perhaps allaying some of those fears.

My History

I was born in 1964 in the UK to a working class family, the eldest of 3 boys. From early childhood I was always gender non-conforming, somewhat feminine in my expression and behaviours and physically small (the complete opposite of my brothers). Fortunately my parents were loving and after I didn’t grow out of my behaviours after a few years simply assumed I was homosexual, which as I approached puberty I and everyone else around me realised I was.

There was, though, something more going on. I recognised that the disconnect I felt to my natal sex and the anguish it caused me was an issue and learned very early that I was transsexual, but kept this secret to myself until my late teens. Back then there was no medical help in the UK for under 18’s and the first gender clinic for children did not open its doors there until I was in my 40’s.

Childhood was difficult, trying to fit in to an expected gender role which required me to try to adopt (unsuccessfully) behaviours which were quite unnatural to me, while coping with the problems Gender Dysphoria caused me. This recognition, though, made me quite resolute and capable as a child and young adult. I was determined not to fail or let this thing beat me, a trait I have witnessed often in other HSTS. We tend to be quite strong willed individuals. I was also, ultimately, very fortunate that puberty had next to no physical effect upon my body and I still looked like a pre-pubertal small boy at 20 years old.

More or less as soon as I was an adult, I left home and tried to exist in the world as a young gay male, afraid of what transitioning would do my life. This  was an abject failure. The cognitive dissonance caused by the gender dysphoria coupled with the recognition that I was no more like the gay men I met than I was the straight men around me, was causing my mental health to suffer. By the time I was 21 I had sought psychiatric help and had been officially diagnosed as suffering from Gender Identity Disorder. By the time I was 23 I had transitioned and was living as a woman in society. By 25 I had undergone Gender Reassignment Surgery.

Concerns about transition

At the time of my announcing my transition to my parents, they expressed many of the fears I have hinted at above and more besides, about what my future (if any) might look like. I too had my own concerns but I knew that this was the only way I was ever going to be happy with my life. They worried about things such as who would employ me, who would love me as a transsexual and they were concerned if I would have to live a sad and lonely life?


I am pleased to report that I experienced no such problems. I passed as female from the moment I began my transition and unlike so few seem to do today, I told nobody of my transsexuality. There were no protections back then for transsexuals or even gay people and secrecy was our greatest ally.


While the first couple of years were tricky on the dating front I was never short of male attention, even after disclosing my trans status. Nor was employment an issue I had previously been working as an insurance clerk before transition and I got a similar job in a neighbouring city but as young woman and began to study to become a lawyer at night school. Two years later after my GRS I moved back to my home city and continued with my life and studies while now working at a law firm as a paralegal.

I dated a couple of men after my GRS but it was clear the relationships were not going to last. At 26 I was also working a second part time job in a local bar to help pay the bills for my study and living expenses where I met a charming and funny man the same age as myself who played on the football (soccer) team. I very quickly developed a friendship and a crush on him, though it took him another 4 months for him to ask me on a date!

After we had been dating a couple of weeks, quite terrified at what his reaction might be, I told him of my past. He was shocked of course and struggled with it and the implications of it for a day or two, but he said it didn’t matter and that he loved me and within a few months he had moved in to my flat. We bought our first home together about a year later and today, 27 years on I am still very happily married to this man. Tick that one off mum and dad!


Obviously not being able to have children (and this was before gay adoption was accepted in the UK) I threw myself into my career and despite the latent sexism of many of the men I worked with was very successful. By the time I was in my mid 30’s I was managing a large law firm and at 40 I set up my own niche law firm with a colleague which we built to be the largest of its kind in the UK before selling it to a multi-national. By the time I was 48 I had moved into corporate governance and we either set up or acquired various other companies including amongst various others 3 additional law firms. Today I am a senior executive and shareholder of a large business group with circa 600 employees. Tick two mum and dad!


I have personally known and corresponded with other HSTS who have had similarly successful life paths. One owns and runs a successful model agency having been a model herself. Another is a senior corporate lawyer at a “Magic Circle” law firm and a third owns and runs a string of hair salons. Each of these women are married to their long term partners. Similarly each of these women live stealth with few if any knowing of their transsexuality. While I don’t know her personally, Kay Brown, another HSTS woman, owns several tech companies in the USA and has led a successful life as mother and business woman.

The point is, as MtF HSTS we have the opportunity to lead normal lives within wider society. We have little difficulty attracting sexual partners or life partners. Our career prospects are no different to those of natal women and if anything they are improved (unfairly so) by not usually suffering the career interruptions caused by childbearing. We are not all sex workers as seems to be the opinion of many people or those who exist only in the “trans/queer community”. We are accepted by all around us and by the men in our lives as women.

Transition for HTST is not the doomsday scenario it is painted to be by the media and others. Have faith, stay grounded and things have a tendency to work out.

Relationships for HSTS: A Survivors Guide

When I first transitioned over 32 years ago in my early 20’s and in a major metropolitan city in the UK, where there were a small but reasonable number of homosexual transsexuals even back then, I wondered if I would ever have the relationship, the home and husband I so desired. The future was an unknown and a main source of concern for my parent’s was what kind of future I could expect as a transsexual. I am thankful to report that at the time of writing I have been with my husband for 27 very happy years and lots of people (not just those who are transsexual) ask me how we have endured when so many others in our peer group’s relationships have ended in divorce.

This article which I hope will serve as some guidance is a collection of my thoughts and observations gleaned from the experience of my own life and relationship with my husband and the relationships of the people I have encountered in life, both HSTS women and natal women. The two are really not that different from each other.

Target Awareness

There are many men who are willing to form relationships with HSTS and there is a good deal of misunderstanding about them, both on the part of other men in society but also by the transsexuals who do or would date and form relationships with them.

We are not for these purposes referring to “Chasers” as they are called by trans women. Chasers will usually date both Autogynephilic transsexuals and HSTS alike as they are specifically attracted to pre-operative trans women, but should be avoided at all costs if you are HSTS. Chasers are men who are fixated on transwomen and are not interested in the woman herself only the body parts!

So many of these men, though not all, will only see you on their terms, secretly and without ever introducing you into his social life or wider peer group. These men have no interest in a serious relationship and are simply using you for their own sexual gratification.

Take my advice and don’t be a doormat, it will not last and these men are interested in only attractive youthful transgirls and youth has a shelf life! Time is your most precious asset, don’t waste it on anything or anyone who is bad for you or sees you as something to be hidden away.

Understanding Behaviour Profiles

There are, though, otherwise heterosexual or bisexual men who are willing to consider and form relationships with HSTS. The misunderstandings referred to in this article can and do often lead to many HSTS having difficulty in forming and maintaining long term relationships with these men and knowing about these misunderstandings and keeping them foremost in your mind can help you avoid them.

HSTS bring two sets of problems to the issue of relationships, one set is obvious: being transsexual we have a unique set of physical and mental obstacles which natal women don’t present. In addition we also have and exhibit so many of the same behavioural and interpersonal difficulties that natal women do in relationships with men (seriously it’s a wonder the species ever survived). We may be genetically male but we are not men and we don’t think like them, though because of our histories we often have a distinct advantage in navigating this second area because we were socialised with boys and so while we don’t experience the same issues as men we understand why it is that they do.

It has been some years since I had personal contact with other HSTS but I used to know a few HSTS women who had stable relationships with their male partners and many more who’s relationships were so often transient and who seemed unable select a suitable long term partner or maintain what appeared to others to be a perfectly viable relationship with a good man. I have also had many more non-trans friends who’s marriages and relationships have sadly failed for the same reasons as set out in this article and so often the reasons are clearly identifiable to the outside observer and could have been so easily remedied.

Bad Timing

Transition is a difficult time and sadly relationships which start mid transition are often doomed to fail. As are same sex relationships which existed before a decision was made to transition by one party. Gay men do not want women, trans or otherwise, so if you are in a gay relationship and decide to transition it will not survive.

Any new relationship is difficult enough when it turns long term and the reality of forming a partnership and moulding all of the financial liabilities associated with it in Western society begin to be realised. Add to this the emotional upheaval and fallout a HSTS experiences from starting a new life, difficulties with other family relationships and the financial burdens of transition itself and it is a wonder any such relationships ever succeed. However it is not unheard of.

Once a HSTS has reached a stable point in their transition, their thoughts inevitable turn to dating men as the new girl and I have experienced and witnessed some of the difficulties that ensue. A lot of HSTS, myself included, have experience of dating men, usually gay men prior to their transition but this is very different to dating straight men who perceive you to be female.

While I myself was always quite demure, my husband told me when he first witnessed other young HSTS friends of mine that the overt public displays of sexuality they made towards men, which are common among gay men, are very unnerving to a straight man especially when they are coming from a woman and it is certainly not the behaviour they would typically expect of a female. The rules of engagement with men have to be rethought, which can be difficult for some HSTS to pick up on as most of us were never socialised as girls. If you have an active history within gay dating pre transition be prepared for a shock once you are presenting full time as a woman.

Some of the girls I used to know threw themselves headlong into dating; “making up for lost time” dating a different man (men) every week. This is all well and good when you are young and feel you have plenty of time but don’t linger too long in this hedonistic revelry. We may not have the same biological clock as natal women but we experience the same disadvantages with ageing and attracting straight men as they do. “The Wall” is real.

Realistic Expectations

We all have the notion of an ideal partner in our heads but so often this is a complete fantasy and totally unrealistic. You need only listen to MGTOW videos on the internet to hear the unrealistic list of expectations they claim women display towards men and the damage this does to their chances of finding lasting and fulfilling relationships.

Transsexual women are no different; we all dream of having that 6’4” athletic, strong, handsome and successful or sometimes slightly dangerous man sweep us off our feet, but that is all it is, a fantasy! Everybody, including men, come with flaws and limitations which have to be balanced with their good points and accepted by their partners if a relationship is to survive.

I have witnessed women both trans and natal to their continued detriment, chose time and time again typical “bad boys” because they are exciting and these women thinking they can change them. Trust me you can’t! These men won’t change for natal women who have their children and they certainly won’t change for you. A man with a criminal history will most likely continue that way and your life will forever be in a state of uncertainty. My advice is no matter how cute they may be, stay away from these men.

Men’s overt masculinity, activities and risk taking propensity is driven by increased or high levels of testosterone. These men so often do not make good long term partners and there is a fair body of evidence that excessive levels of testosterone actually inhibits pair bonding in human males. See Human Male Testosterone and Pair Bonding. Gray et al Chapter 12 Click Here

What to Look For

The vast majority of men in the world are of average attractiveness and have stable financial lives and while they are completely masculine they have been raised to be respectful and protective of women. Learn to recognise these qualities in men, do not dismiss them as being “too nice” these men are the keepers!

Don’t be afraid to widen your demographic either. Dating slightly older men has many advantages especially if he has already farthered children in a previous marriage as this will go some way to avoiding his own wish for biological offspring interfering with your relationship.

Pair Bonding in relationships

Clearly HSTS are not going to be able to provide offspring and this can be a disadvantage in forming such bonds but pair bonding in humans is directly linked to reward reinforcement and dopamine release and other hormonal factors and not just to obligation such as fatherhood. This is not as simple as just having sex with a partner, though that is clearly a part of the pair bond reinforcement dynamic. Dopamine is released whenever we experience any sensation which we enjoy. So ensuring that your behaviours elicit happy responses in your partner and do not cause him to experience relationship anxiety is key to establishing a lasting pair bond. Too much negativity will offset any reward he may experience early in a relationship and tip the balance against him forming a bond with you.

This means you need keep things like irrational behaviour, tantrums and jealousy firmly locked away. If you keep accusing him of sleeping with your room-mate chances are he will eventually do it as men have little patience for continued false accusations! Also do not bombard him with trans related stuff, don’t take him to support groups or lectures on transsexuality, learn to keep that side of your life separate. Trust me they may be understanding of your condition but they don’t want to live it 24/7 for long.

But most of all keep the negativity to a minimum.

What Men Want

As a HSTS, depending on the age you transitioned (pre-adolescents won’t have this) you should have had sufficient exposure to males growing up to form a reasonable understanding of what “makes men tick” and what they value in women. Rod calls this “The Boy Box” You won’t have experienced these desires yourself but you may well as can I, recall males recounting to each other what they valued about their relationships with women. It is not all about the way they look, contrary to what many women believe. They also adore women who are feminine and who accept their partner’s masculinity and don’t seek to criticise or curtail their man’s natural behaviours. Men often need other men as friends (male bonding) and women very often fail to appreciate this and the role it plays in a man’s mental well-being. Women who try to cut their husband’s friends out of his life usually have very unhappy husbands and strained relationships.

Men are not at all complicated when it comes to relationships. The sex thing is obvious (more about that later), but they expect attention from their partner in equal measure to that which they supply (it’s not all about you). They loath drama and in my experience they highly value women who embrace traditional female roles and behavioural traits. They are not really interested, except at a cursory level in beauty queens who spend every waking hour preening themselves, but they are attracted women who reflect the values the historic significant female relatives (mother, grandmother, aunt) in their lives exhibited. That does not mean you have to be a “meek little house wife”, confident men will relish the success of their wives careers so long as it does not come at the expense of their relationship’s quality.

The point is men seeking lasting relationships are not looking for Divas or sex bomb superstars, any sane man is looking for stable partner who is willing to reflect and compliment his perceived societal role, where he doesn’t feel taken advantage of or de-masculinised.


If I and other HSTS I have known are anything to go by when it comes to sexual appetite, then for the men who date us it is like all their Christmases have come at once at the beginning of a relationship. We so often it seems have elevated sex drives in comparison to most natal women. We are usually much more adventurous in bed as we were not subject to female socialisation. Nobody ever taught me or reinforced the concept that “Nice Girls Don’t”. Clearly though, this cannot continue indefinitely; things calm down as relationships develop and age and unless your partner is young he is soon going to be exhausted.

As many non-trans relationships mature sex or lack thereof is often an obstacle to the health of the relationship. So many times I have heard women complain that sex with their husbands has become routine and unsatisfactory. This leads to women going off sex when their husbands desire it and to tensions which, would make otherwise trivial issues become major points of contention and the relationships end up breaking down. So many times this is wholly due to a lack of communication about sex between men and women and unrealistic expectations on the part of women.

Back into the “Boy Box”! Contrary to what many women seem to expect, we HSTS know that men are not mind readers! Ladies he does not know what you are thinking or what you want any more than you know what he is thinking or wants. Tell him, you will be surprised how happy he is to finally know.
HSTS are not totally immune to this, they equally with natal women, can become disenchanted with their sex lives. This cooling of the sexual component can be an inevitable symptom of long term relationships with men who still love and cherish their wives. Loving and sensual sex can be the backbone of a stable relationship and is enjoyable most of the time and reinforces the pair bond.

However, men in long term relationships can very easily fall into the Madonna and Whore Syndrome trap, where they begin to see their wives as somehow pure and detached from raw sexual desire. Women relish tender caring sex but not as a continuous sexual diet and so many, as time passes, lament the lack of passion in their relationships. Of the many divorced couples I have known this has been the main cause of the beginning of their relationship’s failure. Women become unreceptive to sex because it has become perfunctory or routine, men denied sex in the relationship seek it elsewhere.

Men will not change this mind set on their own and need to be left in no uncertain terms that the Madonna is on vacation and that it is the Whore who requires his services tonight. TELL HIM and be delicate about it so as not to seem like you blame him. Seriously, if you cannot talk to your partner openly about your desires the relationship is doomed!


It was not my intention when writing this article to come off as an agony aunt. I have witnessed, read and listened to so many accounts of women complaining about being unable to find decent men, when in reality they are all around them and I have seen HSTS make these same mistakes. I have seen women discard perfectly good men and then instantly regret it. Hopefully knowing of some of these obstacles will help you avoid them.

The future for HSTS

Frequently people ask ‘why are there so many transsexuals, in southeast Asia, for example, or Latin America?’ But this is to ask the question from a minority viewpoint. The real question is ‘why are there so few in the West?’ When we look at the global prevalence of HSTS and its rich history, we see that perhaps the greatest surprise is its almost complete invisibility in the West, at least until recently. It seems likely that in the future, the levels we see elsewhere will become the norm in the West.

There remain, however, many hurdles and we cannot rest. The future remains uncertain and HSTS are children and young adolescents with little voice and we must speak up for them, against the forces that would destroy them, even today.

With the high-profile surgical transition of Coccinelle and later Christine Jurgensen (USA) and April Ashley (UK), it might have been thought that, by the mid-1960s, a veritable HSTS explosion would have taken place. Cross-sex hormones were by then readily available. The first, PreMarIn, had been launched in 1941, and the female contraceptive pill, then containing high dosages of oestrogen, was becoming popular. But this explosion did not happen. It would not be for another 50 years that HSTS prevalence in the West would begin to rise to levels comparable to those found elsewhere and even now, at time of writing, it is far lower than in say, southeast Asia.

We still don’t know why this is.

The Future

Until about five years ago I thought the future was rosy indeed for transsexuals the world over, but most of all in the West. Now I’m less sanguine.

We had arrived at a point where medical and psychiatric professionals and other carers were becoming aware of the reality of transition, even if they didn’t fully understand the reasons for it. Remember that as late as 2010, some doctors in the US were still prescribing massive doses of testosterone to ‘cure’ transsexualism. This tone, of ‘curing’ a disorder, was manifest through paper after paper published in the late 20th and early 21st centuries.

Then, a breakthrough seemed to have occurred; now we were to listen to the young people involved and do what they wanted. This appeared to be progress. We had the case of Kim Petras, a young German HSTS, who had her surgery at 16 and is now living a successful life as a woman. There were many others.

Kim Petras

We were naive; a backlash was inevitable. In the West, the narrative had been comprehensively hijacked, not by pretty, smart girls like Petras, but by old men in dresses like Bruce ‘Caitlyn’ Jenner. Nobody seemed to recognise — or be prepared to say — that these were autogynephilic transvestites, fetishistic crossdressing men, who had no relationship whatsoever to True Transsexuals.

To be transsexual, two conditions must apply: you must be same-sex oriented from childhood — that is, homosexual with regard to birth sex; and cross-sex identified. These parameters must be exclusive. You can’t be a bisexual transsexual — but you can certainly be a pseudo-bisexual transvestite. That in itself is not a problem, but when the latter claim the identity of real transsexuals, the ones they harm are those transsexuals.


We have recently seen a huge increase in the number of referrals to gender clinics. In the UK this has been of the order of more than 4000%, over eight years.

As society becomes less intolerant, especially the Anglo-Saxon culture with its relentless hostility towards male femininity and public acceptance of sex while assiduously pursuing clandestine pederasty, (the British way), then we should indeed expect to see many more HSTS come forward. Why would they endure a miserable life as ‘gay men’ when modern techniques can allow them to live complete lives as women?

There is a problem. Historically, there have been at least twice as many Male-to-Feminine (MtF) transitions as Female-to-Masculine (FtM). The new figures more than invert this, with the overwhelming majority being FtM. Further, Homosexual Gender Dysphoria, the clinical cause of HSTS, in its most observed form, sets on in childhood and will be indicated for years both before and after puberty. There is nothing rapid about its appearance.

The forms of Gender Dysphoria

The non-homosexual forms of Gender Dysphoria can appear almost overnight. There is, simply, no similarity between homosexual and non-homosexual Gender Dysphoria, except that both make the subject desire to transition.

The homosexual form is a natural progression of an innate sexuality in which an individual is attracted to members of the same sex and identifies as a member of the opposite one. Universally, they desire to play the opposite-sex role in sexual relationships; that is, males to be penetrated and females to penetrate.

Non-homosexual Gender Dysphoria in males is caused by a condition called Autogynephilia. This is a narcissistic personality disorder that caused the individual to fetishise the idea of himself as a woman. While the female form is less well understood, it is clear that it shares many similarities. It is non-homosexual; it evinces weak self-ideation, of not knowing whom one really is; it sets on rapidly, perhaps almost overnight, with no warning; and, perhaps most worryingly of all, and especially in the female form, it can vanish just as quickly.

This phenomenon has been called ‘Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria’ or ROGD, which is plausible. The rapidity of its onset, however, it shares with the male form, so perhaps we should just call it ‘female non-homosexual Gender Dyphoria’ although that would yield a less pleasing acronym.

Social contagion

The evidence is that the majority of this uptick in FtM transition, which is occurring in adolescence and early adulthood, is the result of a social contagion. That contagion, in my opinion, is a feminist cult that has taught young girls to believe that ‘gender is a construct invented by men to suppress women’ and that it can therefore, simply be changed. But this is a lie; gender is a function of sexuality and, while that does crystallise over childhood, very soon after puberty, it is fixed. Gender is not a construct; it is the primary interface that humans use to relate to other humans. It cannot be dispensed with or changed.

Today, HSTS, always the most innocent and vulnerable in society, face being used as pawns by unscrupulous people who have no interest in them, but in promoting their own political agenda. These include gender-conforming homosexual males, feminists and others. They call themselves the ‘gender-crits’.

A balance has to be struck between protecting the interests of genuinely HSTS children and those of young women who have been hopelessly confused by a sociophagic political cult. HSTS, especially males, need to transition in their teens, in order to maximise their chances of living full lives as women. People with non-homosexual Gender Dysphoria, especially women, should not transition at all.

If these latter are adults, then it is their choice. But neither they, nor the unholy alliance of ‘gender-crits’ have the right to interfere in other people’s lives or to deny them the opportunity to lives as they want to.

We must protect the innocent and that means standing up to gender-crit bullies and insisting that, while non-homosexual transition is indeed questionable, homosexual transsexualism is well-understood. We know what it is, we can identify it and we must support the young people who have it.

It’s not all doom and gloom

Despite the activities of the gender-crits, for whom I have little time, and the concerns of parents, for whom I have the deepest sympathy, I cannot see the clock turning back.

I am lucky enough to observe the development of trans people in Asia. There are no gatekeepers here. Instead there is a support network that sustains young people and passes to them the wisdom of older ones. A young HSTS’ future is explained to him or her by others who have walked the same path.

An equivalent network now exists in the West, through social media and the Internet. This site is a part of that. Through it, young HSTS can find out what and who they really are and learn how to protect themselves from reactionaries. They can protect their future.

I do not believe that the gender-crits will succeed in their aim of denying all transition therapy to young people, but we must remain vigilant and challenge them at every turn. We must reassure parents of boys that it must be preferable for them to have a happy daughter than a miserable ‘gay’ son, and the opposite for girls. We must show them the HSTS success stories. We must show them that their children can have a future, as HSTS.

At the same time, we now have a body of experience, developed amongst HSTS, that would allow them to circumvent the medical profession in order to get the treatment they need. Nobody wants to see them do that, least of all medical professionals, so we must hope that in the future common sense will prevail and young HSTS will be helped, not hindered.

I believe it will.

HSTS in the United Kingdom: A British affair

One of the great paradoxes is that, while the British exported their repressive and phobic attitudes to the United States, the influence of other cultures there meant that transsexualism was far more prevalent there than in the United Kingdom. This was not the case in the UK, where, until the 20th century, the population was remarkably homogeneous — and that meant, intolerant.

Up until the last quarter of the 20th century, all forms of male femininity were reviled in Britain and homosexual men were in constant danger of abuse and worse, violence. It was an era when hormone therapy to arrest masculinisation was unavailable and in any case, a visit to the doctor was unlikely to be any help. It was usual for adult men who confessed to being sexually receptive to be diagnosed insane and locked up; Alan Turing, the computing genius without whom you would not be reading this, was criminalised, chemically castrated, ostracised and eventually committed suicide — for being homosexual. If they were caught in the act of sex, then prison awaited them for the crime of ‘buggery’. This law was not repealed until 1967.

Homosexuality in Britain at the time had a distinctive character, partly because of the class-based nature of the society and partly because of the extreme hostility to male femininity, which impacted so heavily on HSTS.

‘Public Schools’ — Academies of pederasty

Sexual relations between males were institutionalised in the so-called ‘Public Schools’ — actually private, fee-paying boarding schools — where the elite sent their young to be educated. Boys in Preparatory school would be introduced to their sexual duties by the school masters. When they got to the Boarding School proper, they would become the catamites of the senior boys.

It is often forgotten that the epithet ‘fag’ and its familiar diminutive ‘faggot’ was originally the term applied to a junior boy whose duty it was to ‘do for’ a senior one — running errands, copying lessons, keeping the senior boy’s space tidy and, of course, providing him with sexual services!

Once the junior boy became a senior himself, he was expected to take a junior catamite in his turn. Failure to do so might lead to suspicions about his sexuality and that he was a ‘poof’, that is, someone who so enjoyed being penetrated that he wished to continue.

This illustrates another point which we’ll discuss in another piece: these pederastic sexual arrangements were often regarded, by those within them, as heterosexual. These schools were seats of Classical Education and the boys — there were few similar girls’ schools — were inculcated daily in the literature and ideas of the Ancient Greeks and Romans. It is no wonder at all that they adopted many of their sexual practices too.

The principle that men penetrate

One of these is the principle that ‘men penetrate’. In this, being the penetrator indicates that one has become a man, while being penetrated indicates that one is not a man. In the Public School system, as in the erastes/erominos system of Greece, the noy is not considered a man. This makes his penetration by a man without shame and, as he matures and masculinises, his taking of a younger catamite as his receptive sexual partner is proof that he has indeed become a man.

In the broader society, upper-class males would have sexual relationships with young working men. These males had almost all gone through the Public School system. The class-based nature of this form was that the ‘girls’ — that is the receptive homosexual males — were always either peri-pubertal boys or working-class young men. It would have been completely unacceptable for a man in such a relationship to allow himself to be penetrated, since that would have meant a lower-class male penetrating an upper-class one. Which would never do.

Even cross-dressing was a crime

Mack Freedman, with regard to the UK in the early 20th century, notes:

…the situation in Britain … meant sticking with one’s biological gender…Transgender people, in fact, were arrested simply for cross-dressing, charged with male prostitution, and often convicted on conjecture. This fit into the subliminal mores of fin de siècle Britain, which punished biological males presumed to be “inverts,” people who acted effeminate or otherwise eschewed their biological gender role.i

In other words, feminine behaviour on the part of men was actively persecuted in Britain, conforming to the then extremely phobic attitude of the Anglican Church, which was dominant. This led to  transwomen hiding by appearing to be gender conforming, at least in public. It is certainly the case that many homosexual males in Britain then, who would  likely transition today, were unable to do so for fear of violence, in earlier times. Indeed, many appear not to have so suppressed their own natures that they did not recognise themselves for what they were. One can only imagine the torment such a soul must have suffered.

The English author Quentin Crisp wrote several remarkable books about the life of a highly feminine homosexual male in England. Late in life he said that, after a life of perplexity, he at last knew what he really was — a transsexual. Sadly, he went to his grave without being able to live the life he perhaps should have, as a woman. His words are a damning testament to the cruelty and intolerance of the culture he grew up in.

April Ashley

Britain, up until the 1960s, was not at all a fertile ground for transsexualism. When April Ashley, a post-operative transwoman, made herself and her status famous during her divorce proceedings, the entire nation was shocked. People spoke in hushed whispers about such a thing; they told their children to cover their eyes for fear of seeing the news reports and turned off their radios.

I am not joking; I witnessed this myself — and, of course, it thoroughly fascinated me!

Caroline Cossey

The next high-profile British transwoman to appear was Caroline ‘Tula’ Cossey. Cossey was actually intersex, born with Klinefelter’s Syndrome (XXY). She had been raised as a male, which was normal then, and had had her penis surgically reshaped to better resemble an ordinary male’s.

Cossey eventually gave up trying to be a boy and became a girl instead; and not only that, a high-profile model and minor film star. While it’s certain that the massive homophobic and transphobic prejudice of the UK at that time prevented her from reaching her full career potential, she was and remains a major icon for British HSTS and intersex people.

While this did lead to a thawing of the ice as far as transsexualism was concerned, Britain was extremely repressive. Those young HSTS who were lucky enough to have supportive parents and who were referred in time to the right clinicians, were able to have corrective hormone and surgical therapies that would allow them to transition; but most did not have this opportunity.


For those who did succeed in making an inadequate and unsympathetic system work for them, the standard route was ‘woodworking’.  As soon as the girl began to live as a woman, she would cut off all ties with her former life. She would change her name, move home, get a new job. Typically she would maintain links only with her mother, who would be sworn to secrecy.

Her aim would be the same as any other girl’s: to find a nice man, settle down and to build a life.


Although the general position appears to have improved in the UK, HSTS there still tend to be covert. They avoid ‘LGB’ organisations, recognising that they are not themselves part of that group; they are, once transitioned, heterosexual women and they have no desire to be ‘outed’ for being something they could never have felt comfortable being. At the same time, the image that the public has of transwomen is that of autogynephilic, non-homosexual males, also known as AGPs.

These bear no relationship whatsoever to HSTS transwomen yet persist in claiming association with them. HSTS have no desire to be claimed by them and avoid being so. Quite apart from misleading the public about what a transsexual really is, AGPs are notorious sexual predators who will pursue HSTS as sexual partners — something HSTS invariably reject.

As well as by sexual predation, non-homosexual Western autogynephilic transvestites harm HSTS by erasure. Where the abuse of HSTS might previously have been due to a hyper-masculinised social ideal, fed through a culture of pederasty amongst Britain’s ruling classes, it is now non-homosexual AGPs who wear the boot.

It might be some time before genuine HSTS transwomen are able to counter this.

North America into the 20th Century

Across white North America, mores established elsewhere in Anglo-Saxon culture were strictly applied. These generally prohibited any expression of homosexuality or male femininity and, indeed, often punished it. That did not, however, mean it was eradicated; it just went underground.

In Male Sex Work from Ancient Times to the Near Present, Mack Freedman discusses the situation in the USA in the late 19th century:

‘at the Golden Rule Pleasure Club on West Third Street, (New York)… one was “buzzed” into a room with a table, two chairs, and a young man dressed as, and identifying as, a woman.’

This rise of trans sex work in the USA was noted in an 1894 medical report also cited by Freedman:

In many large cities the subjects of contrary sexual impulse form a class by themselves and are recognized by the police . . . They adopt the names of women, and affect a feminine speech and manner, “falling in love” with each other, and writing amatory and obscene letters. In New York City alone there are no less than one hundred of these, who make a profession of male prostitution, soliciting upon the streets and in parks when they get the opportunity.

Clearly, there were vibrant and active transsexual communities within North American cities prior to the ascendancy of modern ‘LGB’ thinking with its focus on conformity to  ‘gender norms’ and rejection of male femininity.

During the Weimar Republic in Germany, transsexuals and homosexuals were centre-stage; they were the glamorous pinnacle of a culture that delighted in sex and sexuality. After Adolf Hitler rose to power, these individuals were persecuted and the clubs and bars they frequented were closed.

Many Germans at this time fled to the the United States and amongst them were unknown numbers of transsexuals, homosexual cross-dressers and drag queens. Although US commitment to the Allied cause in WW2 caused a hiatus in which all attention was fixed overseas, it is a reasonable assumption that many of these carried on much as they had before, in their adopted home.

Marcel Duchamp as Rrose Selavy

The celebrated French artist Marcel Duchamp, after arriving in the USA, maintained a second character called Rrose Selavy.  Duchamp was certainly not alone, although he was the most high-profile. There is no doubt that Duchamp lived his life as a work of performance art and his female character was a part of that.

It is not clear what Duchamp’s sexuality actually was. In this as in all of his private life, he was intensely secretive. A number of theories have been put forward 1 but we shall never know for sure.

The story of HSTS in North America is characterised as much by what was hidden as by what was revealed.

Lesbians and transmen

Writer Gertrude Stein

While the situation regarding transwomen was at least somewhat documented, lesbians and transmen were rather ignored. However,  prominent gender-non-conforming  (GNC) lesbian women like the celebrated writer Gertrude Stein (above) clearly shows that the GNC tradition of lesbian culture was strongly developed in the earlier 20th century.

Native and Hispanic influences

Two Spirit people and related  homosexual and transsexual expressions had long been part of Native American culture but these were largely destroyed by the colonists. Within Anglo-Saxon culture the predominant form of homosexuality was clandestine pederasty.

This did not lack the class element typical of Anglo-Saxon culture and, while this was not exclusively the case, tended to devolve to upper and middle-class men seeking sex with adolescent boys. This was effectively ignored in the culture, with a few high-profile exceptions such as the case of Oscar Wilde. The playwright had insisted on seducing the teenage son of a Lord of the Realm; this was a gross breach of English sensibilities, aggravated because he was Irish. In general, gentlemen were able to seduce boys without censure.

The United States, while founded on Anglo-Saxon ideals, was never a purely Anglo-Saxon nation. Especially after the end of the Civil War in 1865, huge levels of immigration, especially from other areas of Europe, brought very different mores. In many southern European cultures, transsexualism was well established as a natural expression of male homosexuality and immigrants from these areas brought their laissez-faire attitudes with them.

At the same time, the US had significant so-called Hispanic populations, which had taken on the mores both of Native American cultures (which they largely were) and those of their own colonisers, who were mainly Spanish.  This meant that within the geographical borders of the United States there were significant populations wherein homosexuality and transsexualism were commonplace; that they were disregarded by the mainstream culture has more to do with that mainstream culture than the others.

Today, increased levels of immigration from Spanish-speaking Latin America has introduced an infusion of new transsexual blood to the cultural milieu. While these cultures can be extremely macho they are also traditional ‘two-group’ cultures in which women have great power as mothers and grandmothers. No man from one of them will disrespect his mother nor flaunt her wishes.

As we discuss elsewhere, within these traditional ‘two group’ societies, there is a social space for feminine homosexual boys, especially if they are beautiful. This individuals themselves are constantly at risk from insecure men, but they are nevertheless there and supported within the culture.

When we look at the United States, we are looking at an incredibly complex cultural multiverse within which ideas and mores seep from one culture into the other.


Similarly, in Canada, there are influences from the Native American traditions, which were generally sympathetic to homosexuality and transsexualism, but these are added to by the powerful French tradition — which is largely ignored by Anglophone commenters, because they do not speak French.

France, especially southern France, has always been far more tolerant of homosexuality and transsexualism than Anglo-Saxon culture, being much closer in nature to Spain and Italy, its Mediterranean neighbours. This has given Francophone Canadian culture a very different flavour, in sexual terms, from its other ones.

Considering the different cultural forces at work across North America today, it is clear that the dominant white Anglo-Saxon culture has been eroded and that other cultures have begun to assert their authority — and their appeal.

Nowhere is this more evident than in the development of the modern ‘LGBTQ’ movement. This is a white, Anglo-Saxon understanding. In terms of male homosexuality, it rejects male femininity and all forms of transsexualism. For the half-century between 1960 and 2010, roughly, this was absolutely the dominant male homosexual expression, simply because it was Anglo-Saxon.

Sylvia Rae Rivera

Over the last decade, this has radically changed. The contribution of transsexuals like Sylvia Rae Rivera, who comes from a Hispanic tradition, is once more being recognised.  Rivera is only one of many and the ability of accommodationist white homosexual men to set the sexual agenda for the USA is rapidly reducing. On the one hand, they are confronted by a resurgent, conservative Anglo-Saxon culture and on the other by cultures in which feminine boys are expected to be girls — and are happier being so.


20th to 21st

The triumph — albeit partial and apparently not permanent — of accommodationist homosexual thinking was always an intellectual overlay, much more realised in the writings of academics than in the day-to-day lives of homosexuals and transsexuals. As the 20th century transitioned into the 21st, a huge resurgence of HSTS and GNC homosexual identities, both in males and females, began to make itself known.

Pic: Mark Seliger




Europe before 1900: The burning times

The imposition of Christianity as the Roman state religion caused huge changes. In the first place, the temples to the various goddesses who had previously had transsexual priestesses were all closed. Although Jews were — somewhat warily — tolerated by the new Christian Roman authorities, the old — now considered unfashionable, ‘pagan’ — religions, were suppressed. Along with them, of course, went the opportunity for transsexual priestesses.

In 342, the Christian Emperors Constantius II and Constans declared the death penalty for any man who ‘took on the passive role of a bride’. In 390, at which time the Empire had divided into three, all the Emperors, Valentinian II, Theodosius I and Arcadius, denounced males ‘acting the part of a woman’, and condemned those who were guilty of such acts to be publicly burned. This edict was confirmed by Justinian in the sixth century.

At the same time, male homosexuality and transsexualism came under extreme levels of religious persecution both form the Catholic church and later, the Protestant ones. Through Gratian’s Decretum the death penalty for homosexual males — by which was meant, initially, those receptive in sex — was adopted by all the European nations. Alfonso X of Castile favoured castration followed by hanging upside down until dead, while Ferdinand and Isabella changed this to the more traditional burning.Incredible levels of violence, against males who were receptive in sex, were to become the norm.

It is absolutely certain that transsexuals would have borne the brunt of this savagery.

Male homosexuality, however, because it is innate, persisted despite the danger and violence, which meant that HSTS, which is the natural end-point of transgender male homosexuality, also did, albeit covertly and latently. But there were still examples.

Gregory of Tours (538 to 594 CE) wrote a story about a man who had worn women’s clothing as a child and had continued into adulthood by dressing as a nun and living in a convent.

The Chevalier d’Eon

The persecution was not, as in other areas, equal. While poorer people had to bear the full brunt of religious zeal against homosexuality, the upper classes were largely left alone.

The Chevalier d’Eon (1728 to 1810) was a male French diplomat and mistress to King Louis XV. He spent the second half of his life as a woman. Eonism, a term referring to cross-gendered behaviour, was derived from d’Eon’s name. It was first used by Havelock Ellis, but the term is no longer in wide use. (Although this individual was more likely an autogynephile rather than HSTS, we include the example; and we will never be sure.)


One fascinating example of how HSTS was able to persist in Europe was the mollies. These were young homosexual males who dressed as women and sought sex with men. They are best known through the ‘molly houses’ of England, which were public houses that specifically catered to them. These might have had rooms available for the consummation of sex, although often, too, this was performed outside. Full ‘weddings’ were often arranged, with faux priest overseeing, after which the happy couple would consummate their — albeit temporary — union on a bed set up in the same space; meantime the assembled company followed suit. The molly-houses were dens of extreme licentiousness that rival the bars of Pattaya today.

The mollies’ partners were fascinating. We know little about them, because of the universal disapproval of their lifestyle. However, they seem to have been older males who also affected effeminate modes of presentation and were called ‘queenies’. It is possible that these were older mollies whose youthful beauty had passed them by, but they might also have been transvestite autogynephiles. Even today, in the West, AGP males are known to be attracted to younger HSTS and it’s unlikely that this is a recent phenomenon.

In recent years, it has become fashionable amongst revisionist homosexual activists to depict the Molly Houses as being places where modern expressions of male homosexuality took place, or even that they were just ‘meeting houses for male friends’ but these claims are unsupported. They were places where cross-dressed transgender male homosexuals made themselves sexually available to other men.

While there certainly were gender-conforming male prostitutes who served men in cities all over Europe, the Molly Houses were very specific and here, younger males principally played the role of women. That is, they dressed in female clothing and were receptive in sex. Molly Houses hosted formalised role-play including ‘marriages’ where one of the Mollies and a man were united in a bawdy — and probably drunken — pastiche of a religious wedding. This was then consummated on a bed within the premises, as a public spectacle for all to see. Less formal liaisons were called ‘dirty business’ and in these the partners withdrew either outside or to a private room for the act of sex.

The modern Western expression of male homosexuality, called by Michael Bailey ‘egalitarian’, simply did not exist prior to the 1950s.


By the 19th century HSTS in northern Europe had largely been driven underground by massive social intolerance of male effeminacy and the draconian penalties that were in place. These had been at their most extreme in Europe’s Protestant nations, with the Dutch being particularly vicious. Thousands of homosexual and transsexual people were judicially murdered in the most horrific manner over a period of centuries. Homosexual males remained, of course, but the legal penalties for discovery meant that their activities had to be covert. Appearing to be masculine, a technique that has persisted to this day, was their primary line of defence. There was little opportunity now for HSTS expressions, at least in MtF.

By the beginning of the 19th century a new wind of some tolerance began to blow. After the revolution of 1789, France abolished its anti-homosexuality laws, but the UK had to wait until 1967!

Despite this, homosexuality was an ongoing element of the English ‘Public School’ system, as the excellent Quentin Crisp, who later identified as transsexual, wrote in his book ‘The Naked Civil Servant’.2

Rome and transsexualism in the Empire

The history of transsexualism in Rome was intimately tied to that of religion and, paradoxically, sexual libertinism.

In Rome, it was considered the greatest disgrace for a man to be penetrated, but the Romans had no issues with men penetrating. They saw that as just being what men do; and men duly penetrated, with enthusiasm, anyone or anything that would stay still long enough.

Ganymede was a beautiful boy who was raped by Jupiter in the form of an eagle, in Classical mythology. Ganymede is always portrayed as a girl with long flowing hair; transsexualism was part of Roman culture

They had no concept of ‘homosexuality’ as we would understand the term today. Shame, for a man in Rome, was being made into a woman — which was the inevitable result of being penetrated. Numerous tortures were invented by the Romans that involved inserting large objects into the victim’s anus. This was only partly to cause pain; it was much more to cause shame and embarrassment, especially if carried out in public. Male rape was used, by Romans. to demean and dishonour their enemies.

This dynamic pervaded Roman society and is crucial to understanding it. Rome gave its ideas to the successor cultures in Europe, where they were carried on to the modern world and it is from these ideas that the stigma that still attaches to homosexual and transsexual sex derives. Today, men who are known to associate with transwomen are deliberately slighted, especially if their partner is pre-operative, by the assertion that they are the receptive partners in sex. 2

In Rome, however, transwomen were considered perfectly legitimate sexual partners for a man. Indeed, a beautiful transwoman lover would be admired by other men and her owner (since she would almost certainly be a slave) much envied.

Boys become girls: galli

Boys were also considered to be legitimate lovers for men, as they had been in Greece, but the Romans did not have the subtle relationships between the erastes and the erominos, in which the former educated the latter in all the matters of manhood, while also being his sexual lover. In Rome, boy-love was just for fun and so it was normally between free men and slaves. These slaves were called ‘puer delicatus’ or ‘pretty boy’ and either were purchased and served in a master’s household alongside other sexual slaves, or they were bought by pimps and made to work the streets and bath-houses.

These boys were called ‘galli’, which means ‘Celt’ or ‘Gaul’ because the prettiest were fair-skinned boys who came from Gaul, modern France. The Romans hated the adult Gauls but apparently not their boys. It was widely reputed that Gaulish boys were introduced to being the sexual partners of men, long before they arrived in Rome and so were skilled lovers. Such boys invariably presented as girls.

Many were castrated, especially if they were retained in a household, as this caused them to retain their youthful femininity for far longer. They lived as women, with the other female slaves. However, once they grew older and outlived their usefulness in their master’s household, they would face an uncertain future, although many became household managers. If they were not so lucky, they too might become transsexual prostitutes.

Cybele; Phrygian Goddess of Transsexuals

Transsexual priestess of Cybele

After the Punic Wars, the cult of Cybele, the Phrygian Great Mother, was imported to Rome and so were the rituals surrounding her. Phrygia was in Anatolia, part of what we now call Turkey and is one of the cradles of human culture. The Phrygians had three  qualities that impressed Roman authors: their abilities as horse-soldiers; their ferociousness; and the prominence of transsexualism in their culture.

Cybele’s cult was a derivative of the older Sumerian and Akkadian cults of Inanna and Ishtar, with similar rituals. Cybele herself was cognate to the Sumerian/Akkadian Ereshkigal, to the Egyptian Nephthys and to the Hindu Kalli amongst many others. She is the Goddess in Dark aspect.

An older transsexual arch-priestess of Cybele

In devotion to her, just as they had in previous cultures, boys would work themselves into a trance, using incense, alcohol, other narcotics, music and dance —  and then self-castrate, to become priestesses and temple prostitutes. These boys are often also referred to as ‘galli’ both by Roman writers and later ones, but this is a conflation with the Gaulish ones. However, while the true galli were invariably slaves, self-castration in the cult of Cybele became popular amongst free-born boys of good families.


Other forms of transsexualism existed, which reflected the multi-cultural nature of the Roman Empire. For example, Egypt had become a Roman vassal in the first century CE as a result of the Roman assumption of the former Greek territories, which were established by Alexander the Great.

Philo of Judea (30 BCE to 40 CE) the Jewish philosopher of Alexandria, wrote of a section of the populace:

“Expending every possible care on their outward adornment, they are not ashamed even to employ every device to change artificially their nature as men into women … . Some of them … craving a complete transformation into women, they have amputated their generative members.”

Again, this refers to the removal of the male genitalia, a ‘complete transformation’ in which both testes and penis were removed. This differs from the more commonplace form of castration in which the testes only were removed.


Limited castration, in which only the testes were removed, was performed on slaves. It was especially popular in Egypt, less so in Rome itself. These individuals usually lived as men and the function of castration was to make them less aggressive and more docile. Full castration was more dangerous, took much longer to recover from and could lead to problems with urination and the risk of urinary tract infections.

Where the whole external genitalia were completely removed, the purpose was for the individual, born male, to live as a woman. It was, clearly, transsexualism. It made no difference whether the castration was enforced, as it was for slaves, or voluntary, as it was for free-born boys.


Ovid (43 BCE to 18 CE) was a prolific Roman poet and writer. In modern parlance he would have been described perhaps as a journalist, as he, like many Romans of letters, wrote copiously about the things he observed in the world around him. One of his most famous works is a play titled Metamorphoses. In it, Teresias — a male — becomes Teresa when he hit two copulating snakes with a piece of wood. She was transformed back into a male by the same process. Once again, it is clear that the theme of transsexualism was popular.


The Emperor Elagabalus (203-222) is fascinating. His brief reign occurred in the years 218-222, at the end of which he was killed.

Elagabalus was born in what is now Homs in Syria and inducted to the hereditary priesthood of the solar deity El Gabal, who was worshipped in the city as the supreme deity. In a different approach to the Greeks and Romans who erected statues of their deities in their temples, El Gabal was worshipped in the form of a meteoric black stone. Elaborate ceremonies would mark this stone’s entry to Rome.

Sun worship had increased in popularity in Rome and Elagabalus saw an opportunity to set up El Gabal as the greatest deity in the Empire, stronger even than Jupiter. On his coronation as Emperor, Elagabalus danced, in women’s robes, around the meteoric stone that was the totem of El Gabal. Many sources commented on her beauty and femininity. Throughout a short life, he frequently bemoaned his male genitalia and even promised ‘half the Empire’ to any doctor who could make for him a vagina. He was famously attracted to men.

Elagabalus was only 19 when he was assassinated.


Sporus (see link to separate article) was a slave-boy who served as a prostitute in the household of the Emperor Nero. She bore a striking resemblance to Nero’s wife, which is probably why she had been purchased; slave boys could be more compliant in sex than free-born women. After Nero killed his wife in a fit of rage, he married Sporus and had her castrated in order to be a ‘complete woman’. Sadly, after Nero was deposed, she became the plaything of his successors and eventually committed suicide.

Christianity in Rome

Hermaphrodite always fascinated Greek and Roman men. Frequently she was portrayed in poses like this one — which, amazingly, has survived intact.

Various Emperors, notably Augustus, the first Emperor, made attempts to limit the libertine proclivities of the Roman population, and not just the men. But for hundreds of years after Augustus’ reign, prostitution, including that of boys and transsexuals, persisted and indeed, became a feature of Roman life. As long as cults like that of Cybele and that of Isis, which had been imported from Egypt, along with numerous other goddess cults all vying for popularity and wealth existed, transsexualism remained protected; and as long as Roman men believed that sex with anyone was a laudable act, as long as they were the one penetrating, so the pueri delicati would remain popular sexual partners; the delightful sweetmeats without which no orgy would be complete. But when Rome adopted Christianity as the official State religion, all of that changed.

Although Christianity, in its Roman form, made huge concessions to goddess culture, the avatars of the Goddess that were venerated were those of the Virgin and the Mother, and not those of the Harlot, the temple prostitute, or the transsexual street-prostitutes that were commonplace. Christianity had an absolute injunction against any form of homosexual sex which it applied firmly. It also had a horror of anal penetration, which, after all, in the millennia before modern surgery, was the only way an HSTS transwoman could enjoy sex.

Under the new order, transsexuals were ruthlessly persecuted, both because of their desire to be the male-born lovers of men and their association with ‘pagan’ goddess cults . Rome’s lasting contribution to the history of transsexualism — which had become a commonplace within its culture — would be to drive it underground.